So today, I got onto my laptop, logged into Goodreads and what did I see? My friend marking all the Twilight books into the shelf books-i-cant-be-stuffed-to-read. Kind of sad because she’s missing out on 4 books she could possibly love. That got me wondering, why do we diss Twilight so much? Why is it just the natural reaction to hate it? Here’s some reasons I came up with.
1. Sparkling Vampires and Love Triangles
The most common thing I hear people say about Twilight is “The story was stupid”. As much as I hate to say it, it’s because it’s just a love triangle and not much else. Best explained by this picture.
People want to be shocked or amazed but this book gives us no opportunity. No amazing mystical world building like in City of Bones, no intense action scenes like in Hunger Games. It’s just a whole mouth full of not so fluffy love story. With fangs on the side.
Talking about fangs lead me to my next point which is the mythology of the story. In common myths, vampires under no circumstances can stand the sun. They certainly could not sparkle like diamonds in marble. The thought is just so ridiculous. It doesn’t even add to the hotness of the guys or anything. It’s just randomly there and tries to re-write the vampire story.
2. Simpering MC and 200 yr old Stalker BF
Bella is portrayed as weak and helpless. I hate it when the female MC is weak and helpless. I’m sure many of the female population hate it too. I want the MC to be a fighter. If she’s smart, that’s good. If she talks back, that’s even better. If she can kick ass, I love her. Bella Swan however? She’s none of these things. Plain looking with a dull personality, I have no idea how she could grow on me. And here comes the picture.
Don’t get me started on Edward. He’s mysterious and pale and gorgeous. On the other hand, he’s 200 years old and stalks Bella through the whole first half of Twilight. Apparently he’s got some inner turmoil over Bella. I couldn’t feel that at all. Just like Bella, he’s boring and empty. No way he could grow on me.
3. Too – Detailed Descriptions
I’ve read a lot of reviews on Twilight that complain about the over-describing that it does. From Bella’s breakfast to Edward’s “smoking hot” body, it seems that Ms Meyer just loves descriptions. Books that over-explain tend to knock me off them. Twilight might have gotten its fans from the descriptions of perfect Edward and how much Bella wants him, but it’s also lost many because of them.
4. Rainbow Puke Writing
If you’re wondering what that is, it’s technically the following quote:
“Carlisle!” the angel called, agony in his perfect voice. “Bella, Bella, no, oh please, no, no!” And the angel was sobbing tearless, broken sobs.
The angel shouldn’t weep, it was wrong.
This sort of ties in with point number 3. I literally gagged at that quote. I don’t know how to explain it, but the writing just bothers me. When I see this type of quote/sentence, I just imagine some annoying person saying “Bella, Bella, no, oh please, no, no!” in a high pitched, mocking voice. I really think Stephanie Meyer is a good writer, just that she wastes that talent on writing bad, cliched love stories. Please, just stop.